Patience

I always had to have a plan. Alex is opposite. He is so patient and has no concern over what's ahead. He embraces the fact that God is in control, while I'm always trying to plan our next step. I'm learning that God usually has something different in mind than my plan A or plan B and that my planning is just an allusion of control. I'm not what one would call a control freak, but when it comes to certain things, like this whole adoption process, I tend to want things to go at my speed. This process is going even slower than they said it would and that's when I get all caught up in the "what if's?". What if they lost our paperwork? What if I wrote down the wrong phone number? What if the trainee who did Alex's fingerprinting screwed up? And why do all these questions only come to mind as soon as I try to fall asleep?

It has been two months since we did our fingerprinting and we still haven't heard anything. it doesn't sound like very long but they told us 4 weeks. So we waited and then they said 6. So I decided to wait an extra two weeks without calling because I was sure they were gonna call last week while I was in Fresno. Nope. So I'm going to make calls again tomorrow to politely ask if there is anything else we can do while we wait to hear from the home study agency.

In the meantime I've attended a few parenting and bonding classes, worked on our profile, read up on transracial adoption and children born exposed and addicted to drugs. I'm feeling like I'm on information overload. Not to mention that I'm constantly on Bethany's web forums and Adoption.com reading about other people's adoption experiences.

I'm officially my classes, so I'm doing my online orientation this week and my Foundations for Leadership class starts next week. On top of that I still have two independent study classes I'm working on and I've been leading a small group at church so these this should keep me a little more preoccupied. Hopefully it will make the time go by faster.